Category Archives: Elysia

The Interview

The immigration officer was quite bored when a took a nicotine gum from its package in order to put it in his mouth. He had interviewed more than two dozens of prospective immigrants that day and it was already late. Nevertheless he was not yet able to leave his office as there was one applicant left to be interviewed. While he was chewing the immigration officer asked the man sitting on the opposite side of his desk: Continue reading →

Alice v. Bob

In August 2065 the civil bench of the Elysian Supreme Court issued a notorious verdict, commonly known as the Alice v. Bob 2065 case. Continue reading →

Why do we spank robots

Susan A. Brooks, Chief Technology Officer at the Elysian Android and Robot Corporation (EARC), speech for new robot psychologists:

Many people has asked me why spanking robots is necessary. The answer is that spanking robots is not necessary but it’s nevertheless a good practice. Why?

Continue reading →

Religion in Elysia

Officially the Republic of Elysia is a secular state, though religious sentiments are present in public life and politics. According to the National Religion Survey conducted by the faculty for philosophy, humanist & religious studies of the University of Ilium Novum, the Elysian population can be divided as follows: Continue reading →

Elysian authorities call to stop international adoptions

From The Elysian Republican, May 1, 2065

Elysian foreign minister, Victor Long, has again urged terrestrial governments to outlaw international child adoptions. According to the FM there is ample evidence that many adopted children end up as slaves in the Asteroid Belt. And despite increased controls of the League of Lagrangian Settlements, still a few hundred children have been launched from Earth to the Asteroid Belt last year. Continue reading →

La Chanson de la Saint Elise

Chantons nous la vie d’une heroine

une heroine authentique, qui donnait sa vie pour notre liberté

son nome était Elise, rentissez ce nome

Cette Chanson raconte sa courage

Donc chantez avec nous! Continue reading →

Female rider marries her horse

By our editors in Ilium Novum

An Elysian equestrian loves her horse so much that she decided to get married with her gelding. In an unofficial wedding ceremony Mary Elizabeth and her horse Xerxes were pronounced wife and husband earlier this day.

Though the marriage has no legal significance, the newly wed Mary Elizabeth was very excited. According to her, “Xerxes is a very faithful partner”. The husband seemed to enjoy to wedding carrot cake which was served after the ceremony.

Consummation of the marriage seems unlikely, however, as bestiality carries a life sentence under Elysian law.

Dinner

When I was an undergraduate at the University of Ilium Novum – the eldest non-terrestrial university – I became friends with a young black woman my age, with the name Rachel. A couple of weeks after I met her for the first time, I learned that Rachel was the daughter of the ambassador of the Republic of New Africa to Elysia. Though I found it intriguing, my friend was deliberately playing down her parents since Rachel wanted to be judged on her own merits. Continue reading →

HSB1

They say that he shouted “Eureka, eureka!” when geneticist Rik Veldman discovered the HSB1 gene. Whether he also run through the streets naked is unknown – at least there are no police records showing the genetic engineer had ever been arrested for public nudity. However, we know that the discovery of the HSB1 gene changed to world and gave birth to a new but equally controversial science of psycho-genetics. Continue reading →

New Greece

In Elysian politics the term “New Greece” is used to refer to the Greek branch of the Jovian Trojans. These are the asteroids located in orbit around the fifth Sun-Jupiter Lagrange point, or SJL5 for short. Continue reading →